Saturday, October 20, 2012

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Begin audio transmission of subject_0027_("Paradoxical_Machinations).


"HE came to me last night. HE arrived, wearing the body of Soren. HE spoke in his voice, telling me that there was nothing left. Nothing. Nothing left. There was nothing, unless I join HIM. Truly embrace HIM. That if I didn't, my soul would be sent into the abyss, screaming forever, while I watched HIM use my skin. I can't do it.

I can't do it.

I will embrace the Archangel."

End audio transmission


Friday, October 19, 2012


I managed to get out of the Tower, with about two and a half hours left on the clock on earth. I was in the Tower for about 21 hours, but I appear to have been gone for eight daysish. I have no other way to explain that beyond screw you, I have no idea. Though that's what I usually feel like, so this isn't really a surprise.

Honestly, I'm not sure what to do, now. There's no more Puppets around, Soren's dead (for real. I made sure), the only other Apostle I really cared to know is also dead, and I don't think I'll be going anywhere else anytime soon.

This... is a different feeling.

Wednesday, October 17, 2012


I reached the top about twenty minutes after my last post... and then I realized something.

I wasn't even  on the Tower.

I'm on a "small" tower, relatively speaking. In the distance, I spotted what seemed to be the actual Tower, though maybe it's just screwing with me again. It's huge, easily five to six times the height of this tower, which I'm not sure is even possible back on earth.

At the top, we met Soren. Or, more accurately, he ambushed us when we were about four levels from the top as we were heading back down. I won't bore you with the details of the fight, but I'm the only one left. His ambush killed Jenni outright, and forced me to fight back. During the scuffle, I got hold of the shotgun, and... well...

The janitors have some work to do.


We're up on level 286 and my legs hurt like hell. They've started to change from office floors into labs (shouldn't those be below?). At any rate, I haven't found any chemicals or whatnot, but there are Bunsen burners. It doesn't really help, but it makes me wonder why they're even there.

We're more than 3/4 of the way up the Tower, and the walls are starting to change again, so I think it's going to switch up again.

Friday, October 12, 2012


Has it really been four days since I made the last post? It hasn't felt like that long. And I don't mean that time has flown, I mean that it's been about eight hours by my watch (automatic) since I went through.

So far, there hasn't been much variation. I've climbed through 36 levels of the tower, and each, so far, has looked like an office building. There's desks and computers everywhere, along with smartphones and the like laying around. I checked them out, and each seems to be attached to the floor by a cable. I think they're actually part of the Newborn, though I can't begin to guess at their purpose.

The sky outside is completely covered by smog and smoke. I can't see the sun or moon, and I'm not sure if they're even there. There's... things, down below. Shambling monsters. Luckily, when I stepped through, I came out on the bottom floor of the office, in a lobby of some sort. The things were at the doors, but couldn't come through them, even though they were just made of glass. They pounded and scratched, but the doors held. I kept going up, and so far, it looks like the whole tower is made of glass and steel, with floor to ceiling windows. It lets me keep track of what's going on outside, and it gives me a relative mark of how far up I've gone.

I haven't found anything of note, yet, but I'm getting tired. I'm not sure if I dare sleep, but... well, it's not like I have a choice. Jenni and I can switch of shifts.

I'll update later.

Tuesday, October 9, 2012


I feel like I'm entering the intermediate part of this story. I can plan it out from here: this is the night before the storm. All the threads are coming together. I'll go to the tower and find my answers.

Or I'll die.

I mean, dying was always a possibility from the first time I saw HIM. HE has been haunting me ever since, and, well, considering HIS bloody ways, I'm sort of surprised that I'm still alive right now. That could all be changing, though. The Newborn tore apart the Prophet as if he was paper, yet the Prophet survived death. Does that mean that HE was wearing the Prophet's body and the Newborn was able to destroy it, or does that mean the Prophet was granted a second chance at life, and will that happen to me?

For some reason, I doubt I'll get that same chance.

And it scares me.

I've always been scared of dying, that was the whole reason I joined HIM in the first place. Has it been eating at my gut since the moment I joined HIM? Yes. Have I felt sick and disgusted at the things I've done, yet forced myself to act as if I did it for fun?

Also yes.

But I think that will all change. I've survived the Wooden Girl's attacks through sheer determination, and a little gift from HIM, and the Operator never seemed all that interested in me anyways, but I think the Newborn may outclass, in personal threat to me, anyways. I have to literally go in its domain, then come back out, and for some reason, I don't think that's going to go well. This whole thing is just mad. Soren, an android? I have to go through a portal to a realm of a mad machine god? That sounds like something right out of a bad sci fi novel.

And yet here we are, facing a possible end to the story.

See, I'm not too scared of oblivion either. That I can handle, like going to sleep. What I'm scared of is that HE will never let me go. That I'll awaken, without any control of my own limbs or mind, watching HIM use my body as a puppet for HIS twisted schemes. Ironic, isn't it? I've spent my career fighting Puppets, but that's what will most likely happen to me.

I'm not sure where I'm going with this, so I'll end it here. I go through the portal tomorrow. I'll be traveling light, since I think if I have to spend too long in there, chances are slim I'll be coming back.

Alive, anyways.

Sunday, October 7, 2012

I think I've got it

I've been putting dates through the equation, and I think I've got it. It's based on the last time the portal opened, which was last December. The portal is set to open three days from now, October the 10th. I'm not sure where exactly it leads, but from what I saw the last time it opened, there was a huge... tower, I guess you could say. A tower built of machinery. I'm not sure exactly what it does, but I want to find out. Jenni will be going with me, which is nice because she has a shotgun.

This will totally work, right guys?

Wednesday, October 3, 2012

Slow and steady wins the race

I think I found out what has a hold on Soren. I've been doing some research, and I'm fairly sure it's something called the Manufactured Newborn.

And before one of you snarky commenters remarks that I could have google searched for it:

A. How do you search for a monster machine? There's thousands of those (on the internet, anyways).

B. I don't have internet all the time. Why do you think I only update this like every twenty years?

Anyways, the Puppets have vanished completely, which, I will admit, has sort of thrown me for a loop. I assumed they'd hang out and fight again, but I guess not. I did, however, find something kinda disturbing: remember the industrial center where we fought the Prophet, almost a year ago? The steel plant? I went back. That was where some dimensional bleeding happened, and I think the same force is at work with Soren.

I spent about two weeks staking it out, then moved in. I found the same place, and I found out that it wasn't an isolated incident. There's marks along the walls, drawn in invisible ink. Most of them are gears/chains of some sort, though I saw an Operator symbol in there, as if it was drawn over the gears to deface them. I stopped looking once I saw it for about fifteen minutes, just in case it drew the Operator's attention. Luckily for me, it didn't, so I went back to looking. I'm fairly sure there's an equation detailing when the portal opens, but it's going to take me some time to figure it out. I'll post when I finish it.

Wednesday, September 5, 2012

An arrival

Jennifer arrived last night. She kept taunting me about her trip to Russia.


We talked for a little bit about potential reasons for why a Puppet would be back here, when something unexpected crashed through the window. That unexpected thing turned out to be Soren, who came at us with a rather large knife.

Me, being the brave guy, promptly booked it for the nearest weapon. Jennifer, being the psychotic one, went at him with a knife she had hidden in her sleeve. While they were in their little tussle, I got hold of my shotty and proceeded to blow a rather large hole in Soren's shoulder. He, in turn, turned and ran.

I swear I saw machinery beneath his skin, though. It reminds me of when the gears came out of bloody nowhere and murdered the Prophet. Perhaps there is a connection?

Monday, September 3, 2012

Found it

I tracked the puppet down last night (early this morning?). It wasn't really trying to hide, so there's that. I cordially asked it to accompany me on an evening stroll, and it graciously agreed. We made a leisurely circuit while discussing such things as the weather, local politics and how I wouldn't rip its tongue out through its bellybutton if it told me why it was here.

The Puppet seemed rather amused at that, and let me know that it was here for multiple reasons, but one in particular: They have Soren.

I scoffed at that. I know Soren is dead, and barring reanimation, that's where he'll stay. It's possible that HE is playing a particularly cruel trick on me, or that the Wooden Girl has begun reanimation of corpses again.

Either way, someone is going to pay, and it started with the Puppet.

Edit: And RIP Thomas Blake. It's a shame to see a fellow Runner who found the true path to fall.

Sunday, September 2, 2012

Bad news...

Well, things just never go my way. I've received word that I may have to work with an Apostle again. Knowing my luck, it'll be Jennifer. Last I heard, she was in Russia, going up against some Oathbreaker who's been experimenting with raising the dead via virus. Understandably, this made HIM slightly irritated, so Jenny was given control of several of the dead and sent to take him down.

I asked her to get me video, which, honestly, would be worth having to work with her again. Zombie vs zombie? Yes please.

On a separate note, I saw a Puppet today. I haven't seen one since March, and if I never saw one again, it'd be too soon. Alas, the universe hates me.

I'll track it down tomorrow and see what it's doing here.

Thursday, August 30, 2012


You thought I was dead, didn't you?


Anyways, just to disappoint you all, I have, in fact, survived. Soren, however, is quite dead. Something about a chemical fire. That's what you get for hauling cases of chemical weapons around.

The whole war thing has died down, thank goodness. However, this means that I have slightly less to do.

Since I've had less to do, I've spent a lot of time in Syria. Guess why.

But now I'm back. There were rumors going around of someone else making a move on this whole area.

Gentlemen, the Game has begun again.

Wednesday, March 21, 2012



The Oathbreaker found me and chased me out.  By the time I snuck back, all the crates were gone.
Right, so, I went to that warehouse that I mentioned yesterday, It was fairly creepy, what with there being no lights on and a biological agent in there. I made sure to be extra careful when I went in, which saved my life. There was an Oathbreaker on the botoom floor (I was currently occupying a catwalk) who would certainly have seen me if I went in through the front door.

I'm now somewhat stumped on what to do. I don't dare shoot anything in there for fear of rupturing the containers, but I can't just let them set that off.

Hmm... think, think...

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

I started to look further into this epidemic that's been sweeping through the area. I know two things so far:

1. It was indeed caused by a servant of the Plague Doctor.

2. Someone else is investigating, and they're a step ahead of me.

I also discovered that a local company had a shipment of unregistered biological agents sent to one of their storage centers nearby. I'm going to check it out tonight, and see if I can put a stop to it.

Thursday, March 15, 2012

It's been oddly quiet. However, news has been going around about an epidemic that's hit town. I'm going to start investigating. We'll see how my super duper detective skills go.

Sunday, February 26, 2012

Sorry, I've been a wee bit busy. The fighting has died down, so mostly we're just flexing at each other.


Anyways, Soren has gone mysteriously quiet. I wonder what he's up to...

Sunday, February 19, 2012

Busy, busy, busy. There's been a flurry of fights, though luckily I haven't been involved in many. I don't trust my luck to hold too much longer, especially with the assassination attempt by Maple.

Jennifer's been out of town, but is still hanging around. Apparently she was out by Portland before (which is where she first caught wind of me) and thought it was rather boring out there. Plus, she hates the Timberwolves, so she came out here to join me.

Joyous day. I get a psycho for a partner.

Well, any partner is better than no partner. Gotta have someone to watch your back. Either way, it's still getting dangerous around here. I'm going to lie low for a little bit. Apparently I'm getting a shipment of Novichok. Yay.

Though this begs the question, who is it supposed to be used against...?

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Well, that was probably the bloody creepiest thing to happen lately. I had returned home from the failed negotiations (wow, I'm on a roll), and had just settled for whatever crap happened to be in the fridge, when I noticed that I wasn't alone.

A boy, about 8, in a little sailor suit and hat was standing in my room. At first, I was like: HOW ADORABLE.

Then I was like: Wait, how'd he get in here?

Then I thought: Wait, half his face is frozen.

SHIT. IT'S THE COLD BOY (as if I couldn't be any more obvious). And all that took about two seconds.

Then he started to sing a nursery rhyme (maybe? It's not one I've ever heard, but it's disturbing enough to be one). His voice was... rather spellbinding. It went like this:

The piper weaves a frantic tune,
His notes are played in vain.
A child weeps in the corner
The scribe has gone insane.

He sings of merry whisperings
Alas, no one is listening,
Oblivious to what transpires,
He brings his tune oh-so higher.

He tells a tale of shattered minds
What quirky thoughts the mad man finds,
Of twisted dreams and hazy vision,
Of a foolish knight on a dooming mission.

He alone knows who they are,
He alone carries them far.

For he is them, and they are he.

Then he giggled at me and left. Now, if that hadn't sent my weirdness sensor through the roof, the fact that I know where that poem is from (it was written by a guy named Kristopher over on a forum I used to visit), makes it even creepier. I have come to two conclusions:

A. Kris is being stalked by the Cold Boy.
B. The Cold Boy steals people's poems.

I certainly hope it's not the first one. Kris was a cool guy, and I'd hate for him to have to be a Runner =/

And the second one, while not creepy... is a bit odd.

Anyways, I think I'm going to try and sleep, now that I've been kept awake most of the night.

Monday, February 13, 2012


So, remember how I said that an ambassador from the Wooden Girl was here (god, it feels like Star Wars. THE AMBASSADOR IS A JEDI KNIGHT).

Um, anyways.

Yeah. One of the other Apostles (Jennifer), who happened to be in town, showed up with an audio recorder. So, the following is a transcript from the recording, which has been set up suspiciously like a chat recording but is, in fact, not. Also, lots of audible silences will be seen. With awesome sound effects written by yours truly.

*shuffling noises*

Jennifer: Is this on? I think it is.
Paradoxical Machinations: Yeah, look, the equalizer is going. Goodness.
J: Shut up and get on with it.
PM: *muttered* yes ma’am. *louder* SO! Why are you here today, Miss…?
Ambassador: Call me Maple.
PM: Fine, Ms. Maple. What can I do for you today?
M:  *giggles*
J: Please. Scare tactics? You do realize none of those work for us.
M: Whatever you say, Jenni. Now, to business. Doesn’t this war seem a bit silly, to you? Really, fighting over this little city. Who needs it?
PM: Apparently you do. Why?
M: Nothing of importance. My Mistress wants it as a plaything, nothing more.
PM: Yeah, I’m sure. Why this city?
M: Why any city, Mr. Alex?
PM: You tell me.
PM: Go on.
M: My Mistress wants this city for certain people inside of it.
J: And we give a fuck… why?
M: She is willing to stop the… little tussle we’ve been having, in exchange for the giving up of this city.
PM: Considering that you were LOSING, I don’t see the point. My city. GTFO.
M: Are you sure that we were losing? We can bolster the ranks whenever we feel like, after all. Taking control of others is no problem.
J: My Master has control over all the dead, Maple. There’s more dead people than living. Do the math.
M: Are you sure? This could be your final chance.
J: Yeah. We’re sure.
M: Very well.
*Sound of chairs being pushed back*
PM: Wait, look out!
*sound of flesh hitting floor*
*rapid gunshots*
*footsteps receding into distance*
PM: You alright?
J: Yeah.
PM: Thank God she shot fast. She could have gotten us.
J: Well, she didn’t. *inhales shakily* I’m going to go. We’re not giving up the Master’s city, so I expect things are going to pick up a bit. I’ll stick around to lend a hand for a bit.
PM: Thanks. I best start preparing as well. Who knows what’s going to sneak in during the chaos…
*recorder switched off*

So, if you didn’t gather, we told Maple no, she attempted to kill us, missed, and now I think it’s going to get a little more exciting around here…

Wednesday, February 8, 2012

So, apparently word of the Apostles is getting around, but nobody actually knows who we are.

So I guess I get to play exposition fairy today.

So, first things first. I will use the word "so" at the beginning of every line.

So, second things second. We are all, obviously, servants of HIM. There's twelve of us, for added symbolism. Each of us has found "favor" of a sort, though how exactly one gets favor from HIM is still quite the mystery, seeing as he doesn't really care whether any of us live or die. He seems to be the aggressive chess player, who will sacrifice his pieces if it means getting a pawn to the other side of the board.

So, what do we do. Well, we basically act like any other servant does, except that we're a lot more autonomous than most of HIS servants. And by that I mean that we're not crazy, on drugs, or any combination of the two. We're told, through the Prophet usually, but also directly  by HIM, what to do. Sometimes we're also sent through the Empty City to get supplies, such as the recent trip to get some Sarin, which is now gone, thank God.

So, now that that's cleared up, uniform. We always wear gas masks. Even though HE can take any form that HE wishes (of those who have died, anyways), everybody knows him as the guy in a hoody and gas mask. Thus, we always wear gas masks and black hoodies, with the Twin Triangles emblazoned on the back. Intimidating? Quite.

And screw it, I'm done saying so.

Anyways, we get some powerups. Comes with the position. We get some stamina boosts, strength boosts, agility boosts, etc. Nothing superhuman, but enough to make those who get the boost on the level of professionals. Which is nice, in a way.

We're not really connected very much. I've met one other Apostle since I was raised, who was... quite interesting. She was also bloody insane, but in the ways where you won't notice until it's too late. Luckily, I don't need to work with her.

Now excuse me. Apparently an ambassador from the Wooden Girl wishes to meet with me. Joy.

Monday, February 6, 2012

I have work to do, it seems. The Wooden Girl has been pressing up against HIS territory, and I don't mean physical territory. Apparently, he's getting annoyed at her temerity in raising the dead. Same with the Unnamed Child, but apparently she's only raised the one, but he's letting it slide.

Oh goody, Sarin. I don't want to be a terrorist.

Wednesday, February 1, 2012

Well, if I don't have to worry about Proxie, that means that I don't have to worry about death by knife.

Which is something.

And yes, I'm afraid of death. I'd rather it not come for me. Too bad it came to that gang, though.

Sunday, January 29, 2012

Why do they resist death so much? I thought they liked death, and said it was inevitable. Why would they resist it so much while they worship HIM, who is the master of death. Wouldn't they want to die, to be with him?

Granted, you could say the same for me, but this is less worship and more, "I don't want to die quite yet, so I'll suck it up and join him." I'd rather not be forced to work against my will for eternity, or at least for a few more decades, if possible.

Not that it is possible. Somebody (probably Soren or Proxie) will end me first. Can I blame them?

Saturday, January 28, 2012

That was easy.

I felt like Anakin. They thought that I'd be their new guardian. Heh.

Friday, January 27, 2012

Well, I apparently have a new mission.

It's to kill the cultists that had been bothering us earlier. I don't see the point, but... whatever.

Also, Faceless... Light =/= good, and vice versa. You'd do well to remember that.

Thursday, January 26, 2012


I've come to see the Light. None can escape HIM, I see that now. I will embrace him instead.

Wednesday, January 25, 2012


Guys, this is Soren. He's gone.

I found a note, though. It says: Umarmung. Doesn't that mean: "Embrace" in German?

Tuesday, January 24, 2012

Soren says I'm acting differently than I normally do. Maybe I am. Maybe that's a good thing. I don't want to drag him to his death with me, though it's not like he's going to live any longer than I am.

Maybe he'll  die before I do. I wouldn't be all that surprised.

Monday, January 23, 2012

What the hell is the point? If they can just come back to life at whim, being completely controlled... I don't even see the point in fighting back.

At first, I thought I could survive. Win, no. Survive for awhile? Yeah. But... what's the point of surviving? Life just becomes worse and worse, and then when you actually do kick the bucket, you're just brought back to serve. Is this the life I want, constantly hounded and completely empty?

Sunday, January 22, 2012

Soren's back, missed the whole thing. He says that Archy probably took him to screw with me. I hope not.

He makes sense, though, which is the scary thing.  I'm... not sure what to do.

Tuesday, January 17, 2012

God. He was more violent than I thought. He kept screaming about how we weren't going to take her from him, and that he was the only one that she loved.

So we had to shoot him.

I'm just going to go sit in a corner now. What kind of friend does that?


I feel so sorry for him. God, and I can't even remember his name. He's been taken by Little Nameless. He's violent too, so I had to run. I'm going back, though. Hopefully he isn't too far gone.

Found him

Took long enough.

But he doesn't remember my name...

Monday, January 16, 2012

There's something here

One of THEM is here. I just don't know who. Apparently, whoever it is makes them forget their names, people they knew... everything. It's really kind of creepy, actually.

Saturday, January 14, 2012


This place is fucked up. I've met four people today asking me if I've seen "her." Who the hell is this "her?"

Friday, January 13, 2012


We're being rerouted north. Luckily, Soren's parents are rich or something, so we managed to grab a cab, a boat, and several trains. We are now in some small hamlettownthing named Fort Edward.

Thursday, January 12, 2012

I refuse to believe it

I refuse to believe it. That was the most contrived set of coincidences EVER. We had to loop back around onto the freeway right after my last post, and ended back up in Salt Lake, the place I spent a week trying to get out of.

Then, we got rerouted to the airport, and being chased by cultists. So we bought tickets for St. George, which were accidentally switched to New York City. I call shenanigans.

Wednesday, January 11, 2012

Safe, for the moment

We were merrily on our way back, when we decided to loop around town and enter from the south side. Make it a little harder to ambush us.

We almost made it too, but some little dick spotted us, and soon we had a cult car on our tail. We sped up, easily outstripping him (a natural gas burning car, really?), and took a turn to see UNIVERSITY AVE WAS CLOSED FFFFUUUUUUUUUU.

So we had to kind of run a roadblock, a legitimate one this time, and now the police are angry at us. If we didn't have anything else to worry about.

Monday, January 9, 2012

Made it

Made it through. We weren't able to actually get back to my car until today. Luckily, those cultist bastards couldn't figure out which one was mine, or I'm sure my tires would have been slashed or some such thing.

We ran the roadblock with "Reptile" by Skrillex blazing out of my system, and I think we hit three or four of them. Serves 'em right.

Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Not much

Nothing weird has happened, which in itself is quite odd. We've heard reports of what appears to be the most violent gangwar in SLC's recent history on the news.

I suppose you could call it that, since I guess HE actually has some gangs working for HIM. Not sure about the Girl, though.

Also, anyone have tips for smashing througha roadblock?

Sunday, January 1, 2012


Had another tussle with the Prophet. Didn't he get smashed by gears? Why is he still alive?

Granted, he knife fights worth crap.